I remember stealing coins of 25 paisa, 50 paisa and 1 rupee offered to a goddess Laxmi during puja. I did it several times when i was around 10 years old. I used to buy toffees and guavas and eat it alone and occasionally share with a friend. I never confessed this with anyone before or i would hardly share it with anyone in future in real life. I am not sure if my parents noticed that ever.

In school, students used to distribute toffees on the day of birthday. My sister used to bring that one toffee and share it with me. I used to get half piece of toffee or sometimes less than a half if we had to share it with someone else too.

During my school holidays i used to go to my uncle’s place to enjoy with cousins. Once in a family function i got 50 rupees as a kind of love gesture!! My elder cousin brother made me buy cold-drinks. In two days we finished together finished all 50 rupees. Several years later he visited my place and while talking he asked how much pocket money i get and how much was my monthly expenditure! Again several years all of a sudden i got call from this cousin brother when i got a small job after completing my diploma. He made to tell him exact figure of how much my salary was! Few years later i completed bachelor’s degree course and took job. Once again all of sudden i received a call from the same cousin (all of a sudden), i said that i am busy. I never received any call from him again.

Just after the school i happened to lend 20 rupees to a friend. At the time of he returning money he offered me, “lets go and have some snacks” and i agreed. Later he said he returned 20 rupees in the form of snacks.

LOL, how stupid i am even now!

and this blog post doesn’t make any sense.

first time in life i shaved my pubic hair. It was nice feeling. here is Stubble pic for you

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Stubble

On 3rd of march i visited one counselor in Delhi. I was full of stress, laziness, confused and lonely. The institute was beautiful place to visit. The lady counselor was charming and talkative. we talked a lot for around 50-55 minutes.

Opened up all my inner, suppressed thoughts. Struggle of stopping myself from CB and cybersex, difficulty in concentration and lack of motivation, fear of unknown things, sleeplessness. I told her everything.

She suggested for counseling for straight 3-4 months sittings on weekly basis as per their normal procedure. As I work in 24X7X365 shift environment, my week-OFF/holiday day keeps changing. That was the difficulty in finalizing to opt for more counseling sessions as their requirement was fixed day and fixed time.

The experience was good! I wish i could keep going there and seek help to improve my personal life.

Yet another lonely, boring, not exciting birthday spent in a usual way. Got few SMS and very few phone calls wishing me on the same date of my birthday.

Only fun and enjoyable part on my birthdays are Google homepage and Bank websites which shows flowers and cakes.

 

Here I am in unknown city, chilled air and lonely hotel room, nice food, big tall glass buildings and beautiful looking rich people.

I don’t know where is “my girl”, where is fun at work, where is the place I will live in & make it my home.?

where is the destiny?

I know that i would never be confident to ask a girl out.

Or the other way round is i am so sure that i would never be magnetized by some girl to chase her or try to get badly.

Or I am sure that its my fate to have consistently 0 girls in my life.

Or it is because i don’t know what that magic of love is all about.

आज खुपच वाईट वाटत आहे. कारण माहीती नाही२६ वर्षांचा आहे मी आज.. माझ्या जीवनातली ही फेज टीनएज फेज पेक्षा अवघड आहे. ओलमोस्ट लाइक सेकंड टीनएज फेज.

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आजुबाजुला कितीहि गर्दी असाली तरी मी एकटा असतो या अर्थाचे वाक्य कित्येक गाण्यांमधे टिपिकल असते. मी खरोखर हे अनुभवत आहे. मित्र आणि सख्खे नातेवाईक यांच्यात आणि माझ्यात खुप अंतर पडले आहे.

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ना जॉब पैसा चांगला आहे ना इतर सुख पदरात आहे. माणूस समाधानी नसतो म्हणे कधी पण तरीसुद्धा मी इतका एकाकी पडेन असे वाटले नव्हते कधीच.

मित्र त्यांच्या जोब आणि पगाराविषयी सांगतात तेव्हा मी भिकारी असल्यासारखा वाटतो.

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भेंडी आज मस्त रोमॅंटीक गाणी असो वा दर्दभरे गीत असो मुड सॅड, अपसेट होतोच!

आजकाल कोणाच्या पाया पडल्यावर ते जेव्हा आशिर्वाद देतात तेव्हा त्या कॅबमधल्या मुलीची आठवण येते. कुठेही लग्नाचा, जीएफ चा विषय निघाला की त्या कॅबमधल्या मुलीची आठवण येते.

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कशातच काही नाही राव मी.

sometimes i feel like people who dont smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol are sane people, great people.

sometimes i feel like boys who have girlfriends, are great people.

sometimes i feel like girls who ask boys out, are the awesomest!!

anyway, after long break of more than 4 weeks i m back on cb for nude show.

Earlier CB used to be exciting and fun. Over the last few years, cb for me has become boring and boring and boring.

I am not anymore into the Mumbai girl i described in last post. She asks way too personal things and I didn’t like it. I had to block her for few days. Currently we dont chat or talk anymore.

There is one girl in my office. She works in different team. We sometime meet in a cab. we just exchange Hi/Hello. I like her since long back even before we started saying hi/hello. She talks in super awesome way in different languages Hindi, Kannada, Telugu, English…. I like her…. I masturbate sometimes thinking about her. She looks beautiful in white punjabi dress and also in jeans sleeveless jacket.

And i am pretty sure that I am not going to do anything about this girl.. LOL.. I am big looser!!

.

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PS: I didnt go live on CAM. Just watched some porn and masturbating…

शी भेन्चोत.. लई गर्दी होत आहे मनात विचारांची.. लिहिता तर येत नाही; निचरा पण होत नाही अशा विचारांचा.

माझ्या बिल्डींग खालच्या रस्त्याच्या एका टोकाला दहाबारा कुत्र्यांची.. तशीच अजुन एक टोळी आहे रस्त्याच्या दुसर्‍या टोकाला..

काय आयुष्य आहे ना बिचार्‍यांच

मी तरी काय वेगळा आहे त्यांच्यापेक्षा.. ते बिल्डींगबाहेर रस्त्यावर राहतात मी बिल्डींगच्या आत रुममधे राहतो!

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